Friday, March 18, 2016

Why isn't Allegiant the last Divergent film? Because- Four.


I see what you did there Allegiant movie team, and I’m not even mad at you! 

My body is ready!

"On a scale of zero to Allegiant, how much did they change?'  This is the standard question to now be used when speaking about book to movie adaptations.
We're certainly pushing it
 
So, on a scale from zero to Allegiant, how bad is my pain?  The correct answer of course is always Four, even when it’s not. 
The answer is always Four
 
The Allegiant movie is a standalone piece of work that pulls from author Veronica Roth’s third novel of the same name.  To be fair, I’m really not sure why people are surprised that the film wandered as far from the source material as it did.  Insurgent wasn’t exactly a page for page adaptation either, liberties were certainly taken. 
Remember me?
 
Couple that with the fact that a lot of fans were not happy when they read Allegiant, and I’d think people would enjoy the fresh take on the franchise; the angry mob cries of teenage girls in the movie theater, however, would seem to indicate otherwise.
Calm down teens!
 
If you’re the glass half-empty type of book fan, you will leave the theater feeling like your world has been crushed and your heart has been unapologetically ripped from your chest.  You should know that you are also being really melodramatic, just like the teen girls who were sitting in front of me. 

Which side is your soul?
 
Change isn’t always a bad thing, as a matter of fact, change is good.  You change your underwear every day I hope.  Puberty is change, sure it has its ups and downs, but it leads you to a fruitful world of unending possibility.  There are a lot of feelings involved, I know, but don’t be dramatic about it, go with it! 
 
Let’s face it; Veronica Roth’s Allegiant really wasn’t expansive enough to constitute two movies.  For that to happen, the world was going to have to be expanded, and in some cases that expansion has completely changed the layout. 
So without further ado- Plot, plot, plot, plot...

I am

So, this movie was all over the book landscape.  I think I see what they are going for, I could be wrong, but I doubt it.  The first part of the book is loosely represented in the first part of the film.  The second half of the film seemed to focus heavily on the part of the novel ending that took place in Chicago, with some major differences and yet still the same idea.  These events then set up a sort of whole new layer to the plot that I anticipate will heavily influence the first part of Ascendant, with the second half of Ascendant containing that stuff from the end of the novel that took place at the Bureau of Genetic Fuckupery.  It’s a clever way to take limited content and spread it out by adding content instead of filer.  I may be in the minority here, but I do see what they were going for, and I applaud it. 

Someone who gets it

There were many things that the film did well, the most obvious for me being that they were able to really capture the split perspective, between Four and Tris, the way it was represented in the book.  I’d go as far as to say that Allegiant was more heavily focused on Four, which you will never hear me complain about. 
It makes me dizzy, but I don't even care
 
Theo James’ role this time around was very physical, more so than in the past two films even.  I’d seriously watch Four sitting on a couch, watching the Smurfs for two hours, so getting to see him kick some serious ass was an all-around good time. 
All day!
 
Hormones aside, Four is one of my favorite literary characters.  He is a complicated, layered and temperamental individual.  His response to the fringe, and what the bureau was doing there, was exactly as it should have been.  I fully support the shower he took before leaving, though.
Is it me or is his hair dry?


Why wouldn’t he have a Truman show like Four fan club?  I can’t think of a single reason. 
OMG, FOUR!
 
Know what else was an improvement?  Tris’ slightly longer, less wish troll, length hair.  Thank you Shailene.  Otherwise, Tris was typical Tris, pretty in line with what the character goes through in the book.  She did get to straddle Four while scaling a wall.  She can now cross that off of her bucket list, and I can add it to mine. 
Top of my list!
Suspend disbelief engaged! 
Yes, apparently Tris can fly a pod-plane thing.
 
Speaking of things done well- Miles Teller does it well.  Peter has consistently been one of my favorite parts of the movie series, and that is owed 100% to Miles.  The snark and the douchey charm are impossible not to loathe and love at the same time.  I was slightly disappointed that his existential introspective plotline was left behind; leaving us entirely with the same old opportunistic Peter we’ve always known.  I’m seriously hoping that gets explored in Ascendant. 
Word!
 
That said; let’s have some quick quipped convo about the direction and misdirection some characters were taken in. 


Hey, at least they killed Tori, right? 
To die?
 
Caleb, you started off like the Caleb I know, and you ended the film in a completely different way.  The Allegiant movie team seems to have Robin Hooded Peter’s sort of redemption arc, and in this story, Caleb, you are the poor.  It was actually nice to watch Caleb awkwardly stumble his way to bravery and back into Tris’ good graces. 
Jail can change a guy.
 
This guy- that memory serum engulfed him enough to make him forget how annoying he is, right? 
Why doesn't she love me?

 
Nita, I adore you and your downplayed role.  Here is to serving your purpose and nothing more!

Let's stir some shit up!

This Norman Bates side-part guy was seriously creeping me out.  Whether it was lurking in a corner and staring, or using his oddly soothing voice to spy on Tris while she undressed and got cleansed, he was freaking me the hell out.  But he saved Four so it’s all good. 
It's pretty creepy.
 
Amar… 
 
Exactly.

We all loved David, right?  The dumb and dumberest smart guy around, of course he thinks he is doing the right thing.  Naturally, he is totally evil.   

Seems legit.

Alright, I could do this all day really, but I have other stuff to do, like work, that makes me money.  I do want to touch on the aspect of the technology, though.  Flying pods, floating lifts, and pure city were just a few of the new additions to the film that fell a bit flat. 

WTF is happening here?

I get it, these people have the technology to genetically engineer humans, and so they should have had more advanced types of other technology than what we saw in the novels, but floating people pods, really?  The exception to this rule was the droid tech, now that was fun! 

I'll have one, thanks.

Pure city sounds like an awful boring place, by the way.  Do you agree?  Let me know in the comments.

Thursday, December 3, 2015

Justice is just ice smooshed together! 10 things we can learn from the Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice Trailer

Last night the internet broke with the role out of the newest Batman v Superman:  Dawn of Justice trailer.  The release of the trailer garnered a mix of emotions, most were seemingly positive.  The bottom line is that you can't please everyone.  Over the last few days this is the majority of what I saw on social media:

People Three Days Ago:  There isn't enough footage in this clip!  *grumble*

People Yesterday:  There is TOO MUCH footage in this trailer!  *cry*

It's funny because it's sad. 

Moving on; in this post I'm going to analyze the trailer and see what we can learn about it and more importantly, from it.  I think I'll call it the "Tornado in a Trailer Park" series, because it is my full intention to rip through the trailer from one end to the other and see what is left standing. 

Before I start I think I should make clear that I know how big of a deal this movie is.  It's been so long in the making that I'm almost scared to watch it, because if I don't like it I might just lose my faith in all things nerd.  Batman is my absolute favorite Superhero, and I wont lie, I teared up during the Justice League episode of Smallville, many years ago.  That said, I'll never understand why superheroes are fighting with each other, you would think there weren't enough super villains to keep them busy.  That isn't the case by the way.  There are in fact so many villains in the DC Universe that we could do without a few of them.  This guy for instance - unnecessary. 

*sigh*

What this movie should be called:  Batman v Superman:  Dawn of the realization that there are too many damn bad guys out there for the superheroes to be fighting each other.  Now lets rip this trailer apart and see what we can learn!

1. The entire first part of this trailer watches like a presidential debate.  Adorkable Kent, who for some reason doesn't know who Bruce Wayne is and walks around throwing shade for majority of this trailer, plays the role of the Democratic Party.  While Bruce, he plays the role of the Republican Party . It basically goes like this:

Kent: So, what do you think about this AWFUL guy who is trying to stop crime by locking up criminals? 

Wayne:  *Giggles at his own inside joke*

Kent:  Gotham scum lives matter!

Wayne:  All Gotham lives matter! 

Kent:  You can't be above the law, but you CAN be below it.  Think about it.

Wayne:  What about YOUR superhero, you know, the one who destroys cities, and is an illegal alien?  Deportation!!

What do you think, not Batman?


I think I have a problem with people who wear suits, and I'm not a hypocrite!

Seems valid.  It was riveting really, this first meeting, but *ugh* - isn't there enough Trump on TV?


2.  NEVER trust a guy with a side part and a crazy look in his eye.  Case in point:

There is even a clown!

Who doesn't?!

3.  Try not to inadvertently become what you are trying to destroy in the world.  That is all the philosophy you will get in this review.

You must all kneel before... wait?


4.  No one is above Shameless foreshadowing:

Look, that Plot Point is hidden on a sign, pay attention!

5.  God hates Aliens - Fact!  I'm not sure what kind of facts they actually used to come to this conclusion, but it is written on a sign, so it must be true.

Like you know!

Great Scott!

6. Always practice safe bondage.  It looks like even superheroes have safe words, and Batman did not hesitate to use it!  Wonder what it is?  Any guesses?  Superman looks pretty disappointed.

*waiting, in the grey dungeon of pain*

I think his face may have froze that way

Wienerschnitzel!  Wienerschnitzel!

Dammit, and I was in such a good mood!


I said wienerschnitzel!

Wait, now I'm really pissed.  Can't you tell by my different facial expression?

7. The more stuff you blow up, the less people will care what else is going on.  Just because Superman is faster than a speeding bullet, doesn't mean the rest of us are... slow it down there.  Not only did I almost vomit, but I had a hard time figuring out what was actually happening.  Oh wait, I see what you did there. 

WTF is even happening here?

Awesome!  The whole city is getting blown up!

8.  Remember that foreshadowed plot point I mentioned earlier, the one about doom?  Never, and I repeat, NEVER leave the bad guys body laying around mostly dead.  Mostly dead is not the same as all dead, everyone knows that.  This opens the door for people to come back and get you while your getting busy in a tent, prevents you from ever forgetting last summer, and allows any creeper with a brain and a side part to try and revive said bad guy, turning him into a Goro/Ninja Turtle/Groot hybrid intent on being the hammer that crushes your pretty skull, and further crushes your city.  Lex is not so quietly reminding them about rule number two of Zombieland, the double tap. 

He looks like he could just be sleeping! 
That is because you didn't chop him up in little pieces
and scatter him in space!

Truth!

You had to go and ask and spoil the big surprise...
 
It's NinjaGrootO, err, Doomsday! 

The best list of rules ever written.


9.  Never fear, a Woman will always save the day! 

Boom!

Batman:  Great, another costumed freak!

The Trinity!  The GODfather, The Scared of the Sun, and The Holey Costume!


10.  I leave you with one final lesson from this trailer.  The most important one yet.  Batman is infinitely cooler than Superman.  And don't you dare take that as a political endorsement!  Good day!

That's all!

*Boop*